The Clay Hole University · Thoughts from Dan
Making Friends as an Adult Is BrutalPrintable pottery guide
An open letter on why making friends after twenty-five is so hard, what actually builds a friendship, and the six things that help on the walk from the car to the door.
- An open letter
- 16 printable pages
- 13-term glossary
- 5 questions for you
- Instant download
- Prints on any home printer
- The full lesson stays free online
What is the printable edition of Making Friends as an Adult Is Brutal?
It is the open letter of the same name, printed so you can hold it and write on it. It starts with a text somebody sent the studio at 9:40 on a Tuesday night, asking whether it would be weird to come alone. Dan explains what changed after twenty-five, why you cannot schedule a friendship and can only schedule the room, and what the first eight weeks of turning up actually feel like. Then six things that help. On paper it adds a page for logging those eight weeks, a short glossary, five questions to answer for yourself, and three lessons to go on with.
Prefer to read it online first? “Making Friends as an Adult Is Brutal” is free to read, and always will be.
- 16printable pages, US Letter
- 5questions to answer for yourself, with the letter’s own notes
- 7QR codes, each on a short Clay Hole address
- 13glossary terms in plain language
- 1workbook pages you fill in yourself
You cannot schedule a friendship. You can only schedule the room.
Until about twenty-five, proximity did the work: school, dorms, the first job. Then the rooms went away, and nobody warned anybody.
This letter is about the machinery rather than the feeling. Repetition nobody has to negotiate, something to do with your hands, and no agenda at all.
It ends in six things that help, and a page for logging your first eight weeks anywhere new.
Real pages from the letter
These are actual pages from the guide, shown here with the sample watermark. The full guide has none.

The letter beginsA text at 9:40 on a Tuesday night, asking whether it would be weird to come alone. 
Your first eight weeksOne row a week: what happened, whether you got there early, and the names you know. 
The glossaryThirteen of the letter’s own words, from third places to the week three dip. 
Questions for youFive questions with no right answers, and what the letter says about each.
A letter you can hold
It is a letter about turning up in a room. It reads better away from the phone that has been offering you rooms instead.
Eight weeks, one row each
Week three is a liar. The log is how you see that for yourself.
Six things that help
What to do on the walk from the car to the door, in order.
The week by week map
What weeks one, two, three and six actually feel like, so none of them surprises you.
Something to keep
A letter to reread in week three, when nothing has happened yet.
Built to be read once and kept
Every guide in the series is designed as a workbook first and a document second. For this one, that means:
The whole letter, unchanged
Dan’s words, start to sign off, including both postscripts.
A page to write on
Eight weeks of turning up, logged one row at a time.
The six things that help
Gathered where you can find them again.
Thirteen words worth knowing
From third places to the standing night.
Codes that keep working
Every QR code points at a short Clay Hole address, so a printed copy keeps working when a video moves.
The lesson is free. It always will be.
All of the teaching in this guide comes from the free “Making Friends as an Adult Is Brutal” lesson at The Clay Hole University. No paywall, no sign-up, no catch.
Somebody texted us at 9:40 on a Tuesday night to ask whether it would be weird to come alone. Not what it cost. Whether it would be weird. That question is why this letter exists, and why it stays free.
The University is free and stays free. The guides are the version rebuilt for paper with an unreasonable amount of care, and buying one keeps the free side going.
Thank you. Genuinely.
Dan Pearce, founder of The Clay Hole
Build a little pottery library
Every guide carries a permanent number. This one is 17.03, the third letter in Thoughts from Dan. The series is designed to live together in a binder, section by section, so the craft ends up on your shelf in the order you learn it.
Put any five printable guides in your cart and the cheapest one is on us. Put in nine and the two cheapest are on us. It happens automatically at checkout, no code to remember.
See every printable guide, or every printable we sell on one page.
- 5guides in your cart1 on us
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Where this letter leads
These lessons pick up where this one leaves off. Each one is free to read now.
-
Guide 15.05 · free lessonWhy You and Your Journey Are the Only One You Can Compare Yourself ToComparison Is the Thief of Joy, from the P.S.: the other half of being in a room full of people.
Read the free lesson -
Guide 15.04 · free lessonOvercoming Imposter Syndrome as a Potter, an Artist and a HumanFor the first few nights, when it feels as if everybody else already knows each other and what they are doing.
Read the free lesson -
Guide 03.02 · free lessonSetting Boundaries in a Shared StudioOnce you are in the room: how to share a table with people you are still getting to know.
Read the free lesson
Before you buy
Is this different from the free letter?
Is this a pottery lesson?
Is there a quiz?
I am not going to join a pottery studio. Is it still useful?
Do I need a fancy printer?
Can I print it in black and white?
Can I use it on an iPad or laptop instead?
How do I get it after I buy?
What if the guide gets updated?
Can I share it with my class or studio?
Pick a night. Then keep picking it.
Print it, keep it for week three, and log the first eight weeks.
Get the printable · $5.00

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