The Clay Hole University Ā· Studio Life and Etiquette
Everything in a Pottery Studio That Sounds WrongPrintable pottery guide
The free lesson, rebuilt as a field guide you can print: fifty-four innocent pottery words with their real definitions, three protocols for saying the worst of them out loud, and the ten that stop a room.
- Skill level: All levels
- 32 printable pages
- 4 video picks
- 6-question quiz + answer key
- Instant download
- Prints on any home printer
- The full lesson stays free online
What is the printable edition of Everything in a Pottery Studio That Sounds Wrong?
It is the free lesson of the same name, rebuilt as a workbook. It opens with the Straight Face Protocol, then gives fifty-four real terms from the wheel, the wedging table, the glaze room and the kiln room, each with its real definition and a line on what the room does. Three protocols cover the hardest sentences in the building, a labeled diagram names every part of a pot, and a twelve-word game asks which ones we made up. On paper it adds a straight face log, a one-page Straight Face card, a quiz with a full answer key, and a glossary.
Prefer to read it online first? āEverything in a Pottery Studio That Sounds Wrongā is free to read, and always will be.
- 32printable pages, US Letter
- 6quiz questions, with a full answer key
- 4hand-picked videos, each with a QR code
- 16glossary terms in plain language
- 2workbook pages you fill in yourself
Every word is innocent. Not one of them sounds like it.
An instructor leans over the wedging table and tells four brand new members, in total sincerity, to get their whole body over it and push down with their hips. Nobody moves. She is completely right, and that is genuinely how you wedge clay.
Every term in this guide is the accurate one, and most of them are older than the country. We are not fixing the words. We are giving you a way to say them.
It ends in a one-page Straight Face card to keep close, and a log so you can keep score honestly.
Real pages, straight faces
These are actual pages from the guide, shown here with the sample watermark. The full guide has none.

The Straight Face ProtocolFour rules for saying it out loud: normal speed, hands on the clay, never add anything, and if somebody laughs, laugh. 
The field guideFifty-four real terms, each with its real definition and a line on what the room does. 
Real, or did we make it up?Twelve words, nine real and three we invented, with the answers underneath. 
The worst ten, rankedCounting down by how long the room goes quiet, all the way to the undefeated champion.
A card for the wedging table
The words come up at the wheel, with wet hands, not at a screen. The card should be where the words are.
The Straight Face card
The four rules, the tick list, the three protocols and the parts of a pot, on one page.
A straight face log
Ten rows: the word, where it happened, whether your face held, and what the room did.
A game with the answers underneath
Guess which of twelve words we made up, then check. Most people get it wrong, which is the point.
All fifty-four terms
Every one with its real definition, so you know what you are actually being asked to do.
Built for people who would like to keep a straight face
Every guide in the series is designed as a workbook first and a document second. For this one, that means:
A learning dashboard before page one
What you will learn, what you need, the traps, and what success looks like.
Fifty-four real terms
Three field guide sections, eighteen cards each, from the wheel to the kiln room.
Three protocols
Step by step, for pulling a handle, asking how many fingers, and the long stir.
The parts of a pot
A labeled diagram, and why potters named every part after a body on purpose.
The worst ten, ranked
By how long the room goes quiet.
Codes that keep working
Every QR code points at a short Clay Hole address, so a printed copy keeps working when a video moves.
The lesson is free. It always will be.
All of the teaching in this guide comes from the free āEverything in a Pottery Studio That Sounds Wrongā lesson at The Clay Hole University. No paywall, no sign-up, no catch.
I did not want to write this lesson, and I was told that was the point. When a room full of beginners laughs at the same word, nobody is worried about their pot for four seconds. I have never given a correction that did as much good, so this one stays free for everyone.
The University is free and stays free. The guides are the version rebuilt for paper with an unreasonable amount of care, and buying one keeps the free side going.
Thank you. Genuinely.
Dan Pearce, founder of The Clay Hole
Build a little pottery library
Every guide carries a permanent number. This one is 03.05, the fifth guide in Studio Life and Etiquette. The series is designed to live together in a binder, section by section, so the craft ends up on your shelf in the order you learn it.
Put any five printable guides in your cart and the cheapest one is on us. Put in nine and the two cheapest are on us. It happens automatically at checkout, no code to remember.
- 5guides in your cart1 on us
- 9guides in your cart2 on us
From the words to the work
These lessons pick up where this one leaves off. Each one is free to read now.
-
Guide 03.04 · free lessonTo Apron or Not to ApronAnother field guide to how people behave in a studio, this one about what you wear and what happens to it.
Read the free lesson -
Guide 06.01 · free lessonThrowing Off the HumpThe undefeated champion of the ranking, taught properly, and one of the most useful skills on the wheel.
Read the free lesson -
Guide 09.06 · free lessonHow to Pull HandlesNumber two on the ranking, taught properly and at length, with no protocol required.
Read the free lesson
Before you buy
Is this different from the free lesson?
Is any of it rude?
Will it teach me anything about pottery?
I am not at The Clay Hole. Is it still useful?
Do I need a fancy printer?
Can I print it in black and white?
Can I use it on an iPad or laptop instead?
How do I get it after I buy?
What if the guide gets updated?
Can I share it with my class or studio?
Say it at normal speed. Keep your hands wet.
Print it, keep the card close, and then go pull a handle.
Get the printable · $10.00


